The cookie ninja
I was running some errands the other day when I came upon this:
I was confused. I did a double take and sure enough this thing was real, it even had an official city seal on it. Someone please tell me exactly what this defender of the peace in this smart car is supposed to keep safe? And what happens during a high-speed chase? I tried to think of a possible scenario in which he would show up to fight some injustice and people would take him seriously but I came up empty. So maybe we can write an
inappropriate job description for this Public Safety Officer that is fitting for the official vehicle he has been assigned. I’ll start it off, feel free to add your own:
Patrol the perimeter around the vault where Girl Scout cookies are kept to ensure their safety from any potential robbers. They are kept in a vault right? Well maybe he could just be in charge of the Tagalongs and Do-Si-Dos not the Thin Mints, those things are like crack and there’s no telling what lengths some people would be willing to go to for a box.